Rye Assic Adventure Park

Website: http://www.rye-house.co.uk/rye-assic-adventure-park

Weather: Brief spells of bright sunshine and dark tempestuous rainstorms - appropriately bathetic weather for the summer holidays.

Logistics: This place is clearly an adjunct to the Rye House Kart Raceway and feels like a bit of an afterthought. It's just off the A414 and very poorly signposted. You will find yourself in an unmarked carpark near the raceway; steel your nerves and keep going until you see the dinosaurs and that is where you will find the real car park next to the adventure park.   

Activities: There is a very impressive range of activities for the stunningly reasonable price of £4.95 a child (adults and under 1's are free). There are trampolines and bouncy castles, there's a large wooden play area outside, a remote-controlled car track, a quite frankly shonky maze and perfectly fine soft play area inside. There's even a 2 lane bowling alley and a mini go-kart race track as well - though time limits stopped us from trying these out. 

Also every member of staff was absolutely lovely and really really helpful. They were nice to the kids and really accommodating to adults. They were enthusiastic and able to solve problems without fuss. 

Playground: The whole place is a playground. It's ace. Our kids of 7, 5 and 4 were perfectly happy with so much to do. 

Boing!

Coffee: My first cup was terrible but the staff were so nice that I felt confident enough to return it and ask for a replacement. I ended up with a perfectly fine cup of filter coffee for under £2. 

Food: Standard soft play menu - starch dipped in grease. The kids ate the lot with no whinging. There's also a picnic area outside if your kids like vitamins.  

Grounds: The whole thing is themed like an episode of Lost - there's a plane for no apparent reason, velociraptors alongside neo-classical statues - heck, there's even a polar bear. The whole thing feels demented but in a really charming way, even when you account for the decapitated dinosaurs decorating most of the walls.  

Why? Why is there a polar bear in the middle of the race track?

Exactly which greco-roman myth features a velociraptor? 

Mummy, why did they behead the dinosaurs?

Accessibility: As the whole place feels like an after-thought they clearly haven't planned accessibility but with so much to do and with such accommodating staff it might be worth phoning to see what can be arranged. 

Overall: This is one of the weirdest days out we've done but that's no bad thing. The kids had a whale of a time and I got to finish a whole conversation with my mate whilst they played. I consider this a win.